One in Four

Good morning!

Another significant Thursday; today marks Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day.  

Please participate in the International Wave of Light by lighting a candle at 7pm local time to honor all babies gone too soon.  Keep your candle lit for at least an hour to provide a continuous wave of light across the world.

Did you know?  1 in 4 women will lose a baby during pregnancy, delivery or infancy.

I was not aware of this staggering statistic until it happened to me.  In fact, I was the one who swore nothing like this would ever happen to me.  Bad things do not happen to good people.  Right?  Wrong. 

I can still, vividly, remember that day.  Erick and I took Wrigley to the Tea Pot Days parade in the morning.  I remember she was hit with a water balloon and I thought she was going to lose it [she was a three year old at this time & moody because she does not like to be hot] but she ended up just laughing & laughing, a huge relief as Erick and I looked at each other waiting for her reaction.  Such a great morning!  We got home and all rested from the warm weather & then I started having contractions.  I began to time them and they were getting closer and closer.  It was time.  Time to bring sweet Ivy into this world & finally get to bring her home.

My mind replays this day in loops.  Many times, I think I am going crazy.  I cannot focus.  I cannot remember things as used to, like the “old” me could.  My perspective on all things has changed, some for the good [small blessings in disguise], realizing how short life truly is & how unimportant some things really are.  Today marks 16 months since Ivy was born & died.  I am beginning to realize how grief truly changes a person.  I knew there would be a few months of not feeling like myself, for sure.  What I did not realize is that I would get thrusted back into those life changing moments still, 16 months later.  It is a like a bad dream that you continue having night after night. Morning after morning I still wake up and she is not here.

Grief is hard work.  

Today, I challenge you to light a candle at 7pm.  Use #WAWLightTheNight and share on social media!  Help me Light The Night for Ivy and all the babies gone too soon!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.  Proverbs 3:5

Fly high, dragonfly!

Peace and love,

Jess